scatterbrained ADD introduction

okay, I kind of tried the "forgetting myself" exercise; and I think it's a good exercise. maybe my inspirational juices are just REALLY dry right now.

what I came up with for myself (I'm not sure how) is an imaginative take on clips that I've probably seen on Meerkat Manor advertisements. you know how meerkats do that standing-on-their-tiptoes kind of move when they're curious about something? well, it starts with that, with them being run off scared by a bigger, more ferocious animal, but then coming back and taking stance like nothing happened. if that makes sense. kind of like how my chihuahua Pippin tries to hold her own against these beagles that my parents have, but really, she doesn't really do anything other than bark and dart around when they try to catch her, and then she struts around afterwards in an "I knew you couldn't take me on" fashion.

is it bad that I liken myself unto my chihuahua? my wannabe gangsta, white chihuahua? don't judge!

I don't think this is going very well.

I don't know where to go from there, so to abruptly change the subject to a more relevant topic, the last time I made serious attempts at writing I was in elementary school, actually being fairly certain I would be a professional writer when I got older. my talents grew from making a Thanksgiving turkey picture book in kindergarten to writing the melodramas of a seven-year old girl who thought of killing this girl she didn't like in school because she stole her favorite necklace (true story five years into the future, except this heinous girl I speak of also stole my favorite Jewel CD and was just a horrible person in general anyway). with the exception of a few anime fanfiction projects I did in middle school that never got further than the first five pages, that's about what my resume consists of.

I really don't write much of anything at all now, but was inspired to pick this hobby/childhood dream back up after reading Sundays at Tiffany's, a particularly gag-inducing romance novel that James Patterson put his name on to fool people into thinking it might be kind of decent. I got so irritated reading it that as some sort of abstract revenge against the genre I vowed I would write an equally horrible romance novel to make fun of the awful clichés and writing that I've always come across when reading romance. I guess there could be some better reason to write a book, but I take what I can.

I've actually started writing this horrible novel (or at least the first page of it), and I've already realized that I can't make myself go through with writing it as planned. Reading through the garbage I'd been writing and recognizing the fact that I'd be re-reading it a million times over in the process of making it longer kind of scared me away from it. but going off of what I'd already written, I managed to salvage what I'd like to think as a likeable, entertaining Tina Fey-esque main character I can play around with in some potentially interesting situations, so I guess I'll be writing a shitty romance novel after all; just not the one I originally intended to make. :)